Day 334 - Playground

Thought of the day: Lila made a "train" tonight by connecting her paintings and drawing made at home and in her preschool. I was impressed by the length of her train. She had done a lot more than I had at her age. The world is getting a lot more competitive over the past few decades and children are quickly adapting or are made to adapt quickly. As long as she is enjoying her experience and is not overwhelmed or overstimulated, it's not necessarily a bad thing. With choices and opportunities abound, it's the duty, burden and pleasure of the parents to help them navigate through the maze of early life.  It's a long and arduous process but, at the end, there's no greater pleasure for any parents than seeing their children emerge as wholesome and well-rounded individuals ready for the world at large.

Photo of the day:

Lila in a playground in Boulder. With so many walls to climb on, it's no wonder that she developed an interest in climbing so early. I don't think I have seen a climbing wall of any kind until I was already well into my twenties!

Day 298 - Jasmine

Thought of the day: This is the last day of the summer break. Looking back, I think we have had a pretty good summer. We spent time with grandparents in June and August. We stayed in Boulder in July when the summer activities had reached its peak. I didn't sign Jasmine up for any academic activities. I hope that the trips we made and the camps she did has helped her develop her personality and increase her appreciation in people, animals and nature. To me, that's more important than developing academic skills which she will have the entire school year for. And, of course, she has had a lot of fun and she can't wait for the school to start again.

Photo of the day:

Jasmine happy at the Teahouse - she is enjoying the last day of summer break before returning to school tomorrow.

Day 262 - Water Play

Thought of the day: It was a summer day spent near water under the sun.  Too much sun, perhaps, as Jasmine ended the day a shade darker than when she started it.  She had her first swim meet in the afternoon.  It was more fun than competitive and she didn't care a bit what kind of ribbon she got as long as she got one. Whether it was a first place ribbon or a 5th place ribbon, she would accept them with equal giddiness and delight. I wonder when the spirit of competitiveness will eventually kick in.  I hope it won't be for a long, long time so she can enjoy the sport for the beauty and joy of the sport itself and won't be tormented by a singular desire to win.

Photo of the day:

Lila played with water in Lafayette's YMCA when Jasmine had her first swim meet this afternoon.

Day 246 - Lila and Garden

Thought of the day: One of my favorite things to do after lunch is to take a walk with Lila in the streets and trails of Niederweningen. It's practical as she would often run and play on the way and by the time we are heading home, her steam will typically run out and give way to drowsiness and will eventually fall into a peaceful nap on the stroller. Today we took such an excursion again. When I watched Lila play and listened to her mumble to herself, I was touched by her toddler-ly innocence and the utter lack of self-conciousness. Her entire being radiated an envious, pure, unspoiled joy. For her, a flower was as absorbing as the entire world and a moment was no different from the eternity. How did she manage to stay in this blissful state of being? I guess I should not use the word "manage" because this state of being is in her, is her, naturally. Only the grownups need to "manage" as our minds are often so cluttered that we tend to forget our true self. We painstakingly seek the meaning of life when the meaning of life is life itself. We fruitlessly search for the elixir of life when there're no meaningful differences between a moment and the eternity. I am learning a lot by spending time with Lila. I will never have enough of that. And I need that, too.

Photo of the day:

Lila playing in a garden near the Niederweningen church during our walk this afternoon.

Day 231 - Book and Tea

Thought of the day: We are on a Greek island! We have had kids for eight years and this is the first time in as many years that David and I travel together on our own. The kids are staying back in Switzerland with the grandparents - not a bad arrangement for them because there are many things they can do. When we left this afternoon, Lila took it in stride, but Jasmine had a hard time saying goodbye. We are already missing them but it's also nice to have this opportunity to travel on our own.  When we travel with the kids, naturally, much of our energy goes toward keeping them safe, happy and entertained.  Traveling on our own, we can focus more freely on what's going on around us and focus more on each other. It makes an entirely different kind of travel experience.  I think all the couples with kids ought to try this once in a while, if they can.

Photo of the day:

Enjoy a fine book with hot tea on the flight from Switzerland to Santorini. The food served on the Swiss Air flight was surprisingly good - my favorite part was the ice cream and Swiss chocolate!

Day 216 - Tree Climbing

Thought of the day: A switch must have been turned on in Lila's brain right after her birthday.  She had been more difficult in the past two days - had the dreaded "terrible three" arrived?  Just like Jasmine, Lila didn't show any classical signs of "terrible two" - albeit being a little stubborn at times, in general she was a really sweet and easygoing two year old.  Friends and babysitters alike had claimed that she was an angel.  Well, it had been different in the past two days.  Even her preschool teacher noticed that and gave me a few words of caution today, which had never happened before.  I remember a similar phase that Jasmine went through after she turned three.  Is the same thing happening again?  Well, I guess the good news is, we have been through this before so we know what to expect (well, sort of).  And we know that this too shall pass.

Photo of the day:

Girls on a tree.  Jasmine is into tree climbing these days.  I think this phase, too, shall pass!

Day 195 - Lila

Thought of the day: Lila had some pretty wild mood swings since I picked her up from preschool today.  The cause was pretty obvious: lack of sleep.  Her preschool set aside only half an hour for the kids to rest in the afternoon, which was way too short for Lila to take a proper nap.  As a result, she had been taking irregular naps since she started the preschool.  On some days she would skip it altogether, with disastrous effects on herself and the family.  And today was one of those days.  I have been routinely taking her out early so she could nap at home.  However, sometimes my schedule just wouldn't allow that.  The good news is that we're taking her to a different preschool in the fall, where she could get a proper rest.  Of course, by that time she may have already naturally outgrown her need for an afternoon nap, but even if she does, having some downtime to do quiet things is still way better than keeping going all day long without a real break.  I know it would be hard to convince a toddler that getting bored at times is better than getting overtired, but I wish her preschool had known better and had respected the kids' need to rest as much as they had respected the kids' need to play.

Photo of the day:

Lila in a residential neighborhood at Lafayette.  She was at a high point of her mood swings when I took this picture.

Day 194 - Lila

Thought of the day: We have out-of-town visitors staying with us for a couple of days.  Today was their last full day so we took them to Chautauqua as a trip to Boulder seems incomplete without at least a brief stop at Chautauqua.  Lila and I were both a little under the weather but we tagged along anyway (why waste a day inside when you can be out and about?).  We had a good time.  The part I particularly enjoyed was when Lila and I made our way slowly, I mean slowly, from the ranger cottage to the playground.  If you ever take pictures of kids, you may have noticed that coming down to their eye level is often the most important first step.  That's when you can establish rapport and see things the way they're seeing them.  It's exactly the same when you play with them.  You need to first bring yourself to their level and into their world.  In that world, a stick is not just a stick - it's a magic wand; a stone is not just a stone - it's a priceless jewel; a pine cone is not just a pine cone - it's a sea shell from far away; and of course, it's so silly to rush from one place to the other when you can have so much fun just exactly where you are.  Bringing yourself to their level is so important for developing your understanding, compassion and patience towards kids.  It's equally important for developing your relationship with adults who are different from you, which includes pretty much everybody in the world.  I love spending time with my kids.  In a way, they teach me more than I can ever hope to teach them just by being who they are.

Photo of the day:

Lila at Chautauqua - it was a little chilly today and even snowed a bit when we were there.

Day 191 - Happy Music

Thought of the day: We're staying in Estes Park for the weekend.  It's much chillier here than in Boulder but it's good to do something different.  Jasmine loved the coziness of the hotel room and declared that she would not mind staying here forever.  I think that might be a little exaggerated and a spur of the moment declaration, but she is always the happiest when she gets to spend time with us.  It's yet another proof that kids, at least the young ones, crave for the quality time with parents more than anything else.  Watching movies or playing with new toys may provide them with temporary excitements, but there's nothing like the parents' unconditional love and undivided attention to make them genuinely happy.

Photo of the day:

Students of Kutandara Center performing African music on the Pearl St.  Today was the Colorado Children's Day in Boulder where there were fun activities for the kids and all events were free (even the balloon man refused to accept tips).  Looking at this photo reminded me just how warm it was a couple of hours ago!

Day 180 - Jayden

Thought of the day: It has been difficult to put Lila down for an afternoon nap lately.  On some days she didn't need a nap, but on the days when she really needed one she often refused to nap anyway and ended up with a dinner time meltdown.  Today I found a solution which may not be recommended by a pediatrician but it worked out well, at least for one day.  I took her on a bike ride around nap time and she fell into sleep on the way.  I parked the bike securely and made her more comfortable by lowering the bike seat.  She continued napping on the bike for another hour or so before waking up happy.  So this might just be the solution: take her on a bike ride and let her decide whether to fall into sleep or not.  That way I will get in some exercise and she will get some outdoor air, do a little sightseeing, and maybe even get in some sleep once in a while.  Difficult time calls for desperate measures and this is one that I am willing, or maybe even happy, to try.

Photo of the day:

Little boy Jayden in Zhou Mama's restaurant.  He was not tall enough for the table and his chin barely rose above it.  I don't know if he was amused by the sitting situation but it was really cute to watch. Lucky for his mom, he is still too little to let go of the precious daily nap.

Day 178 - Baby Zoe

Thought of the day: We attended a kid's birthday party in a park today.  It was a beautiful day to have an outdoor party.  Adults talked while the kids played and everybody had a blast.  The only problem was that the wind made it challenging to light the birthday candles!  A birthday party provides a nice opportunity for the parents to socialize, especially since the same group of parents tend to meet in several birthday parties in a year and sometimes year after year.  Unfortunately as the kids get older, these parties  turn more and more into kids only parties and most parents would just drop off the kids and come back when the party is almost over.  It's a pity when a party morphs from a social event into a free day care.  If you have been to a packaged birthday party, you'll find that the hosting facility doesn't usually try very hard to accommodate the adults - oftentimes the parents are just expected to stand around when the kids sit down to have cake and such.  It often feels awkward to be there as an adult and maybe that's why most parents decide not to stay.  I wonder if this is a common way of doing things in all cultures or if it's just another symptom of our kid-centric society.

Photo of the day:

Meet baby Zoe - this birthday party gave us the opportunity to finally meet her.

Day 174 - Colorful Beads

Thought of the day: Tonight Jasmine played hide-and-seek with me.  She has always enjoyed this game from as far as I can remember.  I wonder what makes kids enjoy this simple game so much.  Perhaps it feels good to be searched for and to be at the center of attention.  Perhaps the excitement of being found is greater than the excitement of being able to stay out of sight.  Or perhaps it's just fun because it's a game, no other reasons needed.

Photo of the day:

Beads hanging inside a window.  Someone must have had fun making those!

Day 166 - Waiting

Thought of the day:  Today I had a cute conversation with Lila on the way to meet her little friend.  The conversation was carried out in a mixture of Mandarin and English in the car:

  "Where is Izzy's dad?"
  "He is out working."
  "Why is my dad not out working?"
  "Because he works from home."
  "I like my dad to go out working too."
  "But why?"
  "So that I can wait for him to come home every day!"

It would be priceless to see all the things that are going on in her mind.  Sometimes I can't help but feel that she is only letting out the tiniest bit of it, and that's already enough to surprise me and make me smile.

Photo of the day:

Waiting for daddy to come home.

Day 157 - Burning Stones

Thought of the day: We ate dinner at a grill and bar in Copper Mountain Resort tonight.  The interior of the restaurant was a large open area illuminated by lots of different kinds of lights.  And there must be more than a dozen large flat screen TVs running different programs all at the same time.  The sounds and flashing images were so overwhelming that all the kids wanted to do was to run around wild instead of sitting still at the table. I am glad that we don't take our kids to such places often, otherwise there's a risk of having their growing brains permanently mis-wired by all these stimulants, perhaps in the same way that we get our adult brains constantly rewired by smart phones, twitter, facebook, and the like.


Photo of the day:

Skiers spending some quiet time at night next to the fire at Copper Mountain's Burning Stones Plaza.

Day 152 - Toy and Book

Thought of the day: This morning I went to the Mandarin Playgroup with Lila.  She hadn't heard so much Mandarin since we left grandparents' house.  It takes a lot of effort for a child to learn and keep up with a second language.  As I last heard, in order for a child to become an active speaker of a language, she needs to be spoken to in that language exclusively for at least 20% of the time.  Considering the amount of time a child would often spend in a day care, preschool and such, 20% is a lot unless both parents speak the same second language at home.  In addition, a child absorbs a language better in a multimodal environment through activities like reading, playing games and interacting with adults and other children in that language. With the lack of a natural learning environment in a monolingual society, we as parents have to create one for them just like putting together a big puzzle.  The playgroup is an important piece in the puzzle and I'm glad that it's now in place.

Photo of the day:

Usually Jasmine would go the playgroup with us if she doesn't have school.  Unfortunately she was sick today so she had to stay home.  She snugged up on a couch much of the day with her favorite stuff animals and books.

Day 132 - Hope You Dance

Thought of the day: This morning I read on the paper of a recent incident on a local hiking trail.  An older gentleman was lying bleeding on the trail and his situation was clearly calling out for help.  Groups of hikers and dog-walkers just walked right past him without stopping to offer a hand.  At the end, the poor guy had to basically crawl back to his car and drove himself to urgent care.  This story made me sad.  What kind of people would just ignore an injured older man and leave him lying on a hiking trail?  How do these people feel afterwards about themselves?  I am sure these people are not representatives of the general local population, however, I am not surprised that people like that do exist.  They are self centered and protecting their personal interests above and beyond anything else.  Some of them may also have been young and entitled.  I think it's an utter failure of parents to raise young adults who would behave like that.  This incident got me to think: as parents, how do we raise children with good moral values?  Action is worth a lot more than words, so it's necessary for the parents to set good examples for their kids.  And how about peace corps?  Some people say that by the time a person is old enough to volunteer overseas, his character and values may have been too well formed to be influenced for real.   So perhaps we should get them involved in community services early to broaden their perspectives when they are still young.  Unfortunately, there're really no golden bullets here.  There are influences that parents do not realistically have control of.  At the end, we parents just have to do our best and hope that our kids will find the light and grow into people with values and integrity.

Photo of the day:

Jasmine's friend giving Lila a lift up some stairways.  When an 8-yr-old is having so much fun playing with a 2-yr-old, I take it as a good indication that the older girl will grow up into a happy, caring young person.  The complete sentence on the wall  was: "When you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance." Dance they did - in the sun.