Day 365 - Flower and Envelope

Thought of the day: This morning, when I am walking under the brilliant sun on the trail, surrounded by rocky mountains and fall colors, I feel intensely happy. With my birthday coming up tomorrow, I have a feeling that I am entering the prime time of my life. Everything is so perfect at this moment that it seems fleeting and fragile. Somehow happiness always manages to bring out melancholy in me. Perhaps it's time to look outside of my own little world more often. The best way to maintain true inner peace and equilibrium of mind is to change the focus to the world at large. I have been exploring different paths for a few years now and the right path remains elusive to me. Lately I have the luck of being recommended by multiple people a book called "Half the Sky" by Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn. The book documents the plight of many women in the real world. It's a thoroughly researched and immensely touching and convincing book. It's one of those rare books that can move people into action, one that has the potential to shape and change the world. I don't know where it will lead me, but wherever it is, I will be there willingly.


Photo of the day:

A surprise gift from a friend. I have been told by many people that love and happiness are the essential ingredients of life and they are all you need. I don't know. I always feel like there's a third ingredient, a larger purpose of life. Without the third ingredient, I can't help feeling that something is amiss.

Day 363 - Vincent

Thought of the day: I talked to a couple of friends today about my quickly approaching birthday and my apprehension of passing another significant mark in life. They all had some jewels of wisdom to share. I feel very lucky to know people who I can talk to just about anything and always walk away a little wiser and more ready for the joyous adventure we call life.

Photo of the day:

A particularly cute dog of a friend. We took a walk this morning with her two dogs tagging along. At times I felt that we were the ones being walked by the dogs but they were really cute so I didn't mind:-)

Day 359 - Snow Leopard

Thought of the day: Having photography as a hobby can be time consuming and sometimes distracting but above all it is a blessing. No matter where I am, what I do, I can never be bored. Be it a familiar place or a foreign land, a fancy restaurant or a dingy pub, a modern structure or an old barn - no matter where I am, there’s always something interesting to observe and photograph. Always. When I was in Chicago two weeks ago, I was overwhelmed by the sensation of being in an extraordinary place and overjoyed by all the photo opportunities. When I was in the zoo today with my girls, I found many special creatures and special moments to record even though we were certainly no strangers to the zoo. Even in the rare occasions when I don't have a camera handy, my eyes and my mind are seeing and recording images all the time - the world is a special place and I am lucky to be a witness to the grandness of it all. 

Photo of the day:

Snow leopard - caged in and looking sad.  What was he observing from inside his cage?

Day 351 - Lila

Thought of the day: Last night, I was shocked and saddened to learn that Steve Jobs just passed away. His 2005 commencement speech at Stanford was widely shared on Internet and it was an interesting speech to watch. During the speech, he said: "Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything - all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart." What an inspiring message! When I ran on the trail this morning and was about to turn around and head home, I thought of his message. Yes, I had a lot of chores to do at home, but if I were to die today, would they have really mattered that much to me? Wouldn't I be happier if I had spent more time instead in the forest in this beautiful autumn day? The answer was definitely a yes. So, instead of turning around, I kept on running and spent more time on the trail than I would have normally had. It felt great when I eventually headed home. Thank you, Steve Jobs, for your important message and for all the rest you have done for the humanity.

Photo of the day:

Lila with a friend doing artwork in her preschool.  She was wearing a shirt she just tie-died in school. I hope she enjoyed her day as much as I had enjoyed mine.

Day 348 - Pool Chairs

Thought of the day: I went back to my regular routine today. I was told that Lila had missed me a lot when I was away. I could tell as she was almost giddy all day. She tired herself out so much during the day that she dropped into sleep almost instantly tonight. For me, it was good to get away and immerse in an entirely different environment once in a while. I felt that I had been gone for a long time but actually it was only a short three days. Coming back home was like stepping into a different time and space. We slip in and out of different universes all the time, within each we have a distinctive role or roles to play. This goes on for an entire life time and in some religions this goes on for many life times. Are we authentically ourselves in all the universes or are we most authentically ourselves in a specific one? I wonder about that often and I don't think I will ever find a definite answer. 

Photo of the day:

Pool chairs and swim ring.  Jasmine was taking an outdoor swim lesson while Lila played in the play pool. Now that I was back in my regular routine, it was hard to believe that I was in a very different place in the company of very different people doing very different things only yesterday.

Day 344 - Homeless Man

Thought of the day: I flew into Chicago today for a 20-year class reunion. Even though I missed my family already, it was liberating to be able to do something on my own once in a while. There was a great many things that I took for granted before having a family - reading a book without interruptions, wandering about in a strange place without any particular direction, falling into sleep without any thoughts for tomorrow - simple, yet not insignificant, things that you noticed only after you didn't have them any more. When I had them back, at least for this short while, I found that I still missed them after all these years. So, after all, I really haven't changed much, have I? Do people ever change over time? When the opportunities arise, do we fall back into our old behaviors and habits as readily as snow flakes drift effortlessly onto the ground? Are we the drops of water in an ocean that evaporate, form a cloud, come down in a shower, flow into a river, return to the sea after a long journey and end up being exactly the same drops of water that we were many years ago and many continents away? I guess I shall find out in the next few days - a reunion after 20 years of absence shall at least shed some lights to these questions.

Photo of the day:

A homeless man near Chicago's Magnificent Mile. On his left lies a bible and on his right sits a cardboard that says "God Is Good". Amid buzz of the city, he seems remarkably calm. He is one of the fascinating characters I ran into while wandering aimlessly in Chicago downtown.

Day 343 - Play

Thought of the day: Our chiropractor is a pretty amazing person. She has not only a reservoir of knowledge of her field, but also of other related fields as well. She is well connected to the local homeopathic community and is often able to introduce families to a variety of practitioners ranged from doulas to massage therapists. She is a go-to person you can trust. Today I found out that she has a good heart as well. There is a very unfortunate local family that lost their house in the Fourmile Canyon Fire last year and then suffered an even worse blow this summer - a drunk driver hit them, left the father dead and his toddler girl severely injured. Our chiropractor went to the memorial service of the father and was so moved by the desperate situation of the family that she and her colleagues decided to do something for them. They donated an entire day of their work for the benefit of the little girl. I am glad to be part of it and I am grateful to belong to a community that's so generous in heart.

Photo of the day:

Izzy playing with blocks on the floor of a theater. The injured girl is even younger than her. I hope the little girl will be able to fully recover and enjoy a normal life soon.

Day 342 - Lila

Thought of the day: The best time of my day was when I picked up Lila from preschool in the afternoon. Other kids had already left so we were the only ones there. The ground of the preschool was small but it was nice and peaceful so we hung out a bit outside. Lila showed me a collection of painted rocks in the garden, climbed the trees and relished in the opportunity to run about freely. We watched the moving shadows casted by the late afternoon sun while devouring delicious apples Lila collected from the trees. It was fun for Lila and relaxing for me. With two active kids, I have come to enjoy and appreciate these slow and simple moments more ever day.

Photo of the day:

Lila basking in the afternoon sun.

Day 337 - Making Music

Thought of the day: I have missed a few excellent photo opportunities today. I missed a shot of two very dear dogs of my friend when I had coffee in her house this morning. They really snuggled up on me and made me feel all warm and fuzzy. I missed a shot of autumn light when I ran on a trail later in the morning. The light gave everything a soft, delicate and airy touch. In the afternoon, when I was at Jasmine's school to pick her up, I saw a woman and a dog waiting patiently outside for a child to show up. Inexplicably, I didn't have a camera with me again so I could only frame a picture in my mind but didn't actually take a shot. A photographer friend of mine once said that the shots he missed were the best ones and they lived in his mind forever. Perhaps that was not a bad thing - if he had actually taken those shots, they might not have turned out as he had expected and they might have been quickly forgotten. Instead, now he had a reservoir of beautiful and interesting images in his mind. Perhaps, those "missing" images made him the photographer that he was as much as the images he actually took made him. So, I do regret but do not feel bad about missing all those shots today. The important thing is to open my eyes and my mind to see and behold amazing images I encounter every day - at least I have done that today.

Photo of the day:

I finally got to take a few photos when it was already dark outside. Here Lila was "playing" piano for our house guests after dinner. She was not really playing a tune yet but her passion for forcing some interesting sounds out of these black and white keys were both cute and admirable.

Day 330 - Hot Tub

Thought of the day: A friend pointed me to an online enneagram test today. The test identified my dominant personality type. It was pretty fascinating for me as I had never given much thought to personality types and how much impact they might have on our behaviors, actions and emotions. With enneagram, some things that didn’t make much sense to me before started to make sense. In many ways, we ended up where we are, doing what we are doing because of who we are and our personalities have a lot to do with it. Enneagram can be an invaluable tool for one to understand his elusive self and subsequently to rise beyond himself.  There are also some neat theories on how personalities evolve over time and through experiences in life. Another interesting aspect is the compatibility and interactions between people of different personality types. It’s a tool employed by therapists to work out issues in relationships. In any case, I am excited to learn something new - new for me at least - and is eager to learn more about it.

Photo of the day:

Lila in the hot tub while I took a photo from the top.  I am sure enneagram has something to do with me being here at this particular time and taking this particular photo at this particular spot. If I had a different type of personality, I don't know what my life history would have been but I'm pretty sure that this photo would not have been on this blog - in fact, this blog probably wouldn't have existed in the first place.

Day 329 - Energy Monitor

Thought of the day: I volunteered in the annual vision screening event in Jasmine's school today. All day long, kids lined up grade by grade and had their eyesight tested by volunteers. It was my first time doing this and it had been an eye opening experience for me. I got to observe the remarkable physical and behavioral differences between kids from different grades. It's amazing how much difference a single year of age difference can make at this early stage of life. An idea just popped into my head: I want to make a photo book for Jasmine's 10th birthday so she, and we, can see how she has changed from year to year. Our minds mostly live in the present moment and it's easy for us to forget how we or our loved ones once were. "Old" photos will help us recall memories buried deep inside us and help us see the whole person and how her present self came into being. Just like annual vision charts record the vision history, photos record the life history. It would be a pretty interesting and meaningful project to reconstruct a life using photos.


Photo of the day:

Jasmine's climbing gym employs an 100kW solar system to offset a quarter of the electricity usage in the building.  It has one of David's energy monitoring devices installed and the real-time energy information is prominently displayed on the wall near the entrance. The device has a detailed memory of 30 years so you can reconstruct your energy usage history over a long span of time. Hopefully, your usage will trend down over time as you learn more about energy efficiency, pay more attention to your footprint and take steps to reduce it. So, in a way, the device captures your history of becoming a green citizen.

Day 326 - Brunch

Thought of the day: Today is the mid-autumn festival in China. That's an important festival when the families are supposed to sit together at a round table in a quiet courtyard under the brightest moon of the year and appreciate the delicacy of moon cakes. With my immediate family scattered across the globe, I can't recall the last time when we spent the festival together. Indeed, other than my parents, I don't think any of us even celebrates the festival any more. This is one of the lost traditions that I do miss. It makes me sad to realize that some of the special things that I grew up with will probably never be experienced by my children or at least not be experienced in the same way. Of course, they will grow up with their own set of experiences that I would not even have dreamed of as a child. They will be shaped by their own environment and memories just like I was shaped by mine.

Photo of the day:

We had Sunday brunch with a friend at the Teahouse again - it's one of our favorite spots for brunch. I wonder how Jasmine and Lila will remember our many visits to the Teahouse many years from now.

Day 324 - Happy Dance

Thought of the day: We spent a happy morning with our friends hiking at Chautauqua followed by a lunch picnic in the park.  We used to do that every Friday morning but stopped because we got busy with other activities. This morning’s hike and picnic reminded me of how important it is to firmly incorporate fun and meaningful activities into the regular schedule because it’s so easy for them to slip through the cracks and disappear into memories of the past. There are always other little things waiting to fill into the space and it's so important to get our priorities straight and put the things that are really meaningful to us first. In the long run, being able to prioritize can make the difference between a life that’s satisfying and fulfilling and a life that’s lost and aimless.

Photo of the day:

Izzy doing a happy dance after the hike.

Day 321 - Gymnastics

Thought of the day: When I drove down a neighborhood street this morning, I observed a dwarf woman walking up with two large bags of groceries. She was no taller than an average 6 year old child. A group of bikers in their bright and shiny jerseys raced past her, all of them tall and slim. The woman looked up at them warily. She had a small burden to carry in her hands and a probably much heavier burden to carry in her heart every day. I could only imagine her pain growing up with dwarfism and living in a world filled with and designed for people of the normal size. That was also one of those moments that reminded me that no matter who you are and how unlucky you feel, there is always a legion of others who are a lot less fortunate. When you look for it, the reminder is everywhere - in the deluge of daily news, in a lone pedestrian on the sidewalk.

Photo of the day:

Lila in the gymnastics class with her instructor. Lila was one of those lucky kids to be showered by her energy and enthusiasm. In the background, some older kids were doing some gymnastics routines. It was liberating to see all these kids running around so happily and so free from cares and worries.

Day 316 - Lila

Thought of the day: It's September. The first two weeks of frenzy back-to-school and reconnecting-with-people are over.  Time to catch a breather and reflect upon what I have learned over the long Labor Day weekend.  Afterward, the after school activities are going to start in full force and every week is going to come and go at an even faster pace. Such is life when your entire schedule is driven by your school-age kids.

Photo of the day:

Lila in her new preschool.  She enjoys it completely and we are happy to be back in this preschool community.  There is something to be said about going to a neighborhood school that is run by devoted and loving people whom we have known for a long time.

Day 315 - Three Girls

Thought of the day: Disasters on the news are overwhelming.  Sad stories among friends and acquaintances are overwhelming. I don’t know if something is wrong with this world we live in or if it’s just a natural shift of awareness as we get older. Perhaps it's both. Resilient as we are, our capacity for pain and suffering is not boundless. On some days it seems so overwhelming and hopeless. In a way, it’s a relief to bear in mind that we walk on this earth for but a blink of time. As such, we will only accumulate a limited amount of burden and carried it over a limited distance. My friend also kindly reminded me today that what we suffer in life we treasure in arts. Arts can transform pain into beauty and make it more tolerable. Being so busy with life lately, I haven't been able to read or appreciate music or other forms of arts as much as I would like to and perhaps that contributes to the problem. The well of life needs to be constantly replenished lest it will dry up. Conscious of it or not, this is the struggle that we fight every single day.  Today is not my day but tomorrow it will surely be better.

Photo of the day:

My girls and Jasmine's friend playing in our front yard.  The well of life is naturally strong in early life. The most important  and formidable task of a parent is to help it stay that way, nurture it and make it even stronger over time.

Day 308 - Apple Tree

Thought of the day: I had my car washed today and I was not very happy with the result.  It's so often the case when it comes to the quality of work performed by a third party.  The third party certainly doesn't care about the outcome as much as we do.  When the third party needs to serve a large number of customers, quality suffers even more. Every customer is not the same and they may have different demands and expectations. It's difficult to provide a customized solution for everybody. When you work under pressure - either time-wise or financially or both, you do the minimal work necessary to satisfy the majority of your customers instead of doing your best work to satisfy those with high expectations.  This is true for car wash, and is also true for so many other services like housekeeping, cooking, construction and, sadly, public education.  Sometimes there is a good reason to do things ourselves, but we all have limited amount of time and resources to do things in our own way to our satisfaction, so eventually it all comes down to a matter of choice.  What can we put up with and what can we not?  Sometimes we don't even realize that we are making such choices everyday, and when we do, some choices can be hard to make.

Photo of the day:

Girls climbing up an apple tree.  This tree is situated outside of Lila's preschool and has been there for a while.  Jasmine used to climb it when she was little and now they both love to climb it.  As parents, we're making many choices for them on a daily basis, including whether to allow them to climb a tree, whether to send them to school, what to pack for lunch, what activities to do, etc.  Some choices are made subconsciously but they may nonetheless have an impact on their lives.

Day 303 - Roses

Thought of the day: College students are coming back in town this week.  You can tell that by the increasing number of visitors in the cafes and the long lines at the front desks of popular restaurants.  The town seems to have woken up from a lazy summer slumber. You can really feel the energy in the air. On one hand, it's invigorating to have all these young people back in town.  On the other hand, it's a bit frustrating to experience these extra delays in traffic and hour long waits for dinner.  By living in a college town in Colorado where the students make up a quarter of the population, in addition to going through the cycle of seasons, we go through the cycle of the comings and goings of college students. With these two concurrent cycles, "the wheel of time turns, and years come and pass…leaving memories" that will become us and experiences that will define us.

Photo of the day:

A bunch of beautiful roses in Lila's preschool - a thoughtful gift from a student's parents.  It really brightened up the room - a nice symbol of a fresh beginning.

Day 300 - Lila

Thought of the day: I watched a PBS interview with Norwegian foreign minister last night.  When the reporter asked the foreign minister what kind of impact the massacre on Utoeya island was having on the Norwegian youth, the minister replied that the activism and participation of the youth actually went way up instead of being diminished by the threat of violence. He finished by quoting the sentence of a Norwegian teenager: "If one man can hate that much, imagine what we can do together with our combined love." That's an inspiring message coming out of the unspeakable tragedy. The worst of human acts brought out the best of human spirits and give you hope for the future of democracy and humanity.

Photo of the day:

Lila painting in her new preschool's open house event.  This photo recalls in me words like "hope" and "innocence". One day, her generation will be shouldering the responsibility of the world.  Right now, her world consists of loving people, vibrant colors and funny toys.  I sure hope that there won't be events that would make her grow up too fast - the kind of impact that an event like the Norwegian tragedy is likely to have on a generation of Norwegian youth.

Day 295 - Paper Flower

Thought of the day: I had the opportunity to meet a few old friends during this trip. It was fun to catch up with them again. It was interesting to share stories and listen to their hopes and dreams.  The more people I meet and talk to over the years, the more I am convinced that we all face similar challenges.  No matter how different we may look on the surface and how different our paths of lives may seem, we have a lot in common in our core values and aspirations. There's something to be said about that.

Photo of the day:

A wall decoration inside a cafe with my mom's bike parked outside - I borrowed it today to meet a friend there.